Richard, don’t worry, it’ll be safe. Your name is Richard, not Richards. He’s a professional. Do you think he’ll vaporize you because you have the name of his most hated enemy? Just be thankful you’re not a blonde girl. Know what I mean? Besides, anyone who goes around talking in the third person obviously has an ego problem that would prevent such minor mistakes from happening and making himself look like a complete jackass. You have Lasombra’s word on that. Lasombra thinks you need to stop clutching my leg and you need to walk through that door and shake his hand while introducing yourself proudly. Lasombra is happy you’ve grown a spine, now go in there and introduce yourself. Random flashes of electricity and a power outage. Lasombra needs to do more research. Lasombra needs a new cameraman.
Name: Victor Von Doom
Age: Whatever I feel like being (27)
Occupation: Full Time Dictator and Richards Hater. CURSE YOU RICHARDS!!!!
Disclaimer: This interview is reproduced as written by the interviewee with the exception of spelling and some grammar corrections. Picture copyright of its artist/photographer.
Lasombra: When did you start gaming?
Doom: Doom has always been gaming. Ever since Doom was the ripe age of 5, a Doombot has gamed for me. The old NES/SNES games are still very fond to me, especially Super Metroid.
Lasombra: How did you choose your PSN name?
Doom: Sadly Doom got it in Final Fantasy XI, the MMO one, and the name I chose was Bucknasty. Doombots have invested too much to start over and thus Doom is stuck with the name and my threats to the greedy folks at Sony have fallen upon deaf ears. Doom shall crush Sony beneath my boots!
Lasombra; What motivated you to become a trophy hunter? What was your initial spark?
Doom: Well God of War was Doom's first plat and the only reason I got it was because I wanted to see what a platinum trophy looked like. It's how I found this site and why I joined in the first place. To make everyone cower beneath Doom's might!
Lasombra: Are you a trophy hunter, platinum hunter, or a specific hunter? (Example: All GoW game hunter)
Doom: Doom was once a trophy hunter but sadly the Doombots have revolted and my platinums have come to a screeching halt.
Lasombra: How many hours do you dedicate to trophy hunting?
Doom: Not as much as Doom wants.
Lasombra: What motivates you to go for that next trophy? How do you stay motivated after a long gaming session, particularly with grinding trophies?
Doom: Well it's obviously the platinum but even that has failed me. Currently Doom is in a rut; my last plat was Skyrim on New Year's Day.
Lasombra: Have you ever gone through any burnout from your sessions?
Doom: Yes, Doom is currently in month three of a burnout. It is beneath Doom.
Lasombra: What is your proudest platinum? Why? Was it your hardest?
Doom: Marvel vs. Capcom 3! It wasn't my hardest but it sure as hell is my proudest. Well that one and MGS3. I believe I was number 1 for a few weeks before falling to number 2 on the first 50.
Lasombra: Do you have a trophy goal for the year? If so, how far are you along in it?
Doom: Sadly Doom does not.
Lasombra: Do you believe gamers should be allowed to make trophy hunting teams? Why or why not?
Doom: I believe gamers should make whatever they want, even if it means sharing an account to stack up trophies. It's not like there's special prizes for earning plats.
Lasombra: Do you think Sony should create a world database with every user’s PSN trophy info for all to see? Why or why not?
Doom: No. I mean what's the point in that? If people wish to know how far beneath Doom they are, all they have to do is look in the mirror.
Lasombra: What tips do you have for someone trying to reach the next level and going after a difficult platinum?
Doom: Quit. You'll never have what Doom has. -Insert cheesy evil laughter- Stick to it. With patience, you'll reach what Doom already has.
Lasombra: Regardless of the system, what pre-trophy game would you auto-buy if it was released on the PS3 with trophy support?
Doom: Ultimate Doom vs. Richards 3: Super Turbo Arcade Edition 2020. Metal Gear Solid 4 without hesitation. The Collector’s edition is still one of my prized possessions.
Lasombra: Many fans have called in asking a very serious question that we never got an official statement from your press staff yet. Can Doom beat Doom?
Doom: Every match up is 9-1 in Doom's favor, including against himself. So yes, only Doom is capable of defeating Doom.
Lasombra: The 'Can Doom beat Doom question' was referring to the game Doom, not yourself...
Doom: Ahh well you've made Doom feel like a moron. Let's see can Doom beat Doom. There's nothing that Doom can't beat. I shall sue that damn company for taking the good name of Doom and running it to the ground.
Lasombra: What is the next platinum you’re planning on getting to help in your plans to defeat Reed Richards? He officially has twenty-two now. Apparently he found a way to torchproof the controller.
Doom: Richards....Richards! RICHARDS?! CURSE YOU RICHARDS!...-clears throat.- Let's see...it's either going to be Lollipop Chainsaw or The Walking Dead. Probably Lollipop Chainsaw since Juliet reminds Doom of Susan Storm. –Drools-
Lasombra: Why is Doom going through burnout at the moment? World Domination? A nefarious plot by the Fantastic Four to hack your PSN account?
Doom: It maybe a collaboration between the Fantastic Four, Sony and The Salvation Army that Doom attributes to my burnout. Not even the thought of showing everyone Doom's greatness is enough to end this drought.
Lasombra: Does Doom have a favourite brand of energy drink or snack he would happily sign an endorsement for if offered?
Doom: -Holds up a can of Pepsi.-Doom totally does not wish to sell out in such a way. -Eats some Fritos- Doom is NOT a sell out.
Lasombra: Have any games made you want to break a controller like it was Richard’s face mocking you?
Doom: Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom 3 for the Vita. The amount of Rage Quitters in that game is astounding. Doom has bodied people with undefeated streaks, huge win streaks and they've taunted Doom with messages.
Lasombra: I meant something that made you want to break one, not others...
Doom: Ahh yes, Heavy Rain, the Kamikaze trophy. Now Doom had no problems doing it for himself. Took me two tries but when Doom's number one Doombot couldn't do it, I swear I tried that damn thing 30+ times and couldn't get it right. So after paying the developer's office a special visit, Doom walked away with a shiny new trophy and special Madison scenes.
Lasombra: How is the gaming scene in Latveria? Are you funding a superstar team of Latverian slaves to take over the #1 position in the world rankings? You know Duck and Hakoom are funded by Richards, right?
Doom: ....This is news to Doom. I shall pay this Duck and Hakoom a visit with Doombots and Crazygrimmjow who happens to be my brother (He's in this site. Shoutouts to Crazygrimmjow), who happens to be my number one Doombot.
Lasombra: When will Doom be put on the cover of a Wheaties box?
Doom: Doom's face is all over Latveria! After Doom wins gold at every event in the Doomlypics, then Doom may grace this Wheaties box. I'm still not sure.
Lasombra: Give us a rundown in the day of the life of Doom when he starts a gaming session? Do you have snacks, music, posters of the Invisible Girl on your wall?
Doom: Doom starts with the sacrificing of a few slaves just for shits and giggles. Then it's time to grab some Pepsi (Still not a sell out) and gets down to the nitty gritty. There's no real ritual that Doom goes through except for the daily threat to Sony and Konami for a Metal Gear Solid 4 trophy patch. YOU ALL WILL BOW DOWN AND THANK DOOM FOR THIS.
Thank you Mr. Doom sir for allowing me the honour and privilege to interview you while the dead, rotting corpse of my former cameraman becomes a maggot factory on the floor next to me. No, No, thank you sir. Quickly exits the room Now, let’s see, cameramen, camerawomen, ah here we go. For remembering those special intimate moments in your life contact us for filming rates at 785-2625...I don’t think the company will want me to spend that much money on hook...er...I mean camerawomen. Join us next time loyal viewers as I try and figure out how to leave the iron curtain in Episode 16: I Don’t Sparkle, Cha! Hello, yes I’d like camerawomen for an extended overseas trip, yeah, sure give me the VIP package...I need it after this crazy week...
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