Contents



[top]Overview

Players: 1-4
Online Trophies: None
Estimated Time to Platinum: 5-10 hours
Minimum Playthroughs: 1 for each of the two areas
Collectible Trophies: Try Hard, Hat Simulator, Builder Goat, I freaking love goats
Missable Trophies: None
Glitched Trophies: None at this time


[top]Tips & Strategies

Goat Simulator is more of a joke than an actual game. Even so, there are trophies to earn and you'll likely want the fastest way to earn them all. We'll start with a quick overview of the controls.
  • - Lick. Your goat's tongue can defy all sorts of physical limits, both stretching and retracting as if made of the world's best bungee cord. Use it to grab and drag objects, or even go for a ride if manage to latch on to a vehicle. Press again to "un-lick."
  • - Ragdoll. Sometimes the world is just too much, and you collapse in a nervous breakdown. In Goat Simulator, you can do this whenever you like. A quick tap of the button will have your goat crumple and become completely at the mercy of the game's physics (or lack thereof). Press again while on the ground to get up as if nothing happened.
  • - Slow Time. Things moving too fast for you to deal with? Try slowing time to gain a competitive edge! This is especially useful during fast events needing very quick reactions. Press again to resume normal time flow.
  • - Special. Depending on what Mutators you have active, this button will have drastically different effects. You can enable Mutators by unlocking them via particular actions in-game, or by turning them on in the pause menu.
  • On the topic of Mutators, there are a few you should always have enabled just to make things easier. Double Jump and Angel Goat are very helpful in that they help you make difficult jumps much easier. Double jump is self-explanatory, and Angel Goat allows you to control the direction of your falls, even drawing them out to 10x the normal distance you could fall.


[top]Roadmap

Ah, the freedom of being a goat. With the game having only two areas as well as no real story or mission progression, there are no missable trophies, and they can be done in any order you wish. The fastest way to complete everything is to split up the trophies into two groups: GoatVille and Goat City Bay. Go through and earn each of the available trophies in that area before moving on to the next map.


[top]Trophies

[top]
All The Goat!
Unlock all the Goat Trophies!

You are the goat-iest of all goats. Congrats.

[top]
GoatQueen
Become the Queen of GoatVille

GoatVille

In the center of the map, there is an enclosure with a few goats lumbering around, as well as a small tower with a spiral staircase. Make your way to the top and enter the doorway to find yourself in an ornate hallway flanked by a legion of goats. Trot over to the throne and take your place as the Queen of all goats.

*Goat Trophy* There is a goat trophy behind a crate on the left side of the throne room. You can either grab it now or come back later.

[top]
Alexander Goatstafsson
Win the title bout!

GoatVille

Out in the fields you will find a large red ring surrounded by a crowd. Enter the aforementioned ring to be challenged to a sort of sumo match with a few other goats. To do so, you can either headbutt, kick, or even lick them (and then drag them) out of the ring. After defeating the fourth goat, the trophy is yours.

[top]
What is its purpose?
Thrash the Goathenge

GoatVille

While you're near the field, make your way into the woods to find Goat Simulator's version of Stonehenge. Marvel at its beauty and ponder who (or what) could have created such an impressive monument. Then, naturally, headbutt it until all that's left is a pile of rocks. Art critics are so temperamental.

[top]
Angel Goat
Do no evil

You'll probably get this by accident. Resist the temptation to headbutt a hapless civilian for five minutes and you'll net yourself a shiny new trophy. Then you'll be free to cause as much mayhem as your little goat-y heart desires.

[top]
Boulder of Death
Hit the party with the Boulder of Death

GoatVille

Rock and Roll, baby. Past the area where some humans are enjoying a barbecue is a steep hill with a large boulder at the top. Give it a little nudge to pulverize the party-goers and really shake up the neighborhood.

*Goat Trophy* The trophy can be found directly behind the boulder.

[top]
Demogoat
Have 10 gas canisters explode at the same time

Another fairly simple trophy, if you know where to look. In GoatVille, go up to the top of the construction site to find a bunch of canisters clustered together. Alternatively, you can climb to the top of the dam in Goat City Bay to find another group of canisters just waiting for an excuse to explode. Make Michael Bay proud.

[top]
Devil Goat
We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell

GoatVille

Up on the hill near the Boulder of Death, there is a charming little path lined with burning skull torches. I wonder what could be at the end of it... Turns out there's a flaming pentagram at the summit, where you can perform ritualistic sacrifices. Now it's a party! Since you have the location scoped out, it's time to go round up some "guests" to join in your fun... You can go about this by either licking, then dragging innocent humans to the pentagram, or equipping the Goat Queen Mutator from the pause menu/becoming the Goat Queen in the Goat Tower. The latter allows you to spawn up to 4 goat minions by pressing , meaning you'll still need at least one human to complete the sacrifice.

[top]
LOEK master
Find the Sanctum 2 Walker Statue

GoatVille

Near the Goat Tower, there is a trampoline and a tree house. You need to bounce up into the tree house and lick a small metal statue. Simple as that. Now that you've found it, however, you should drag it to the Pentagram on the hill and leave it there. It's one of 3 special items needed to complete a new sacrifice and unlock Trying to bring forth Sanctum 3?

[top]
Pedestrian
Find the Sanctum 1 Walker Statue

GoatVille

The first statue can be found in an upstairs bedroom of the white house you start near. It's sitting on a table in the yellow room. While you're here, grab it an bring it back to the Pentagram to work on Trying to bring forth Sanctum 3?

[top]
Goats 'n' Stuff
Hold your own concert

Goat City Bay

The tallest structure in the level is the skyscraper, requiring you to take the elevator up or use some clever jumping to reach the top. Once there, you will find a party being held by somebody that looks a lot like Deadmau5. Get up on stage with him to get your helmet and you'll take over the concert. If you want to stop the music, hit or disable the Mutator in the pause menu.

[top]
Rymdskepp i Rymden
Travel to space!

GoatVille

Notice the giant crop circles in the field? Time to phone home. Return to the white house near the initial spawn point and head into the garage. On the table is a blue plate of bacon. Lick it and drag it back to the second crop circle with just the rod sticking out of the ground. It will snap together and after about ten seconds, and alien saucer will beam you up and leave you floating in space. You can either spin until you fall back to Earth or respawn.

[top]
A story about my goat
I'm sorry about my goat

Goat City Bay

After crossing the river in the middle of town, you'll see an open garage with Uncle Fred's Workshop above it. Go inside and you'll see a floating blue object in a tube, clearly stating that you shouldn't lick it. But you're probably going to disregard this rule (more what you'd call a guideline, really) and lick it anyway. This will simply shock you and make you fall over. Take out your frustration by running into/headbutting it and you'll earn the trophy.

[top]
Disgusting
Why did you step in that? Yuck

Goat City Bay

Also found along the river is a small outlet from the city's sewage system. You'll know when you've found it, as it emits a greenish cloud and has flies buzzing around it. Step in the water inside it for an easy trophy.

*Hint* You can earn Ling Ling into battle go in the side room or the sewer while you're in the area.

[top]
Ling Ling into battle go
Fight the turtle

Goat City Bay

In the same sewer where you unlocked Disgusting, there is a small room off to the left side upon entering. Take the left turn to see 4 "turdles" that will try to kick you. Headbutt any one of them (or all, if you want) to net the trophy.

*Goat Trophy* There is a goat trophy in the corner for you to collect.

[top]
Dodge This
Make sure the Hillbilly never drives again

GoatVille

You see that imbecile turning donuts out in the field? Tired of being plastered every time you try to hit his car? It's time to show him the error of his ways. You're going to need a very large rock. Return to the Boulder of Death and lick it to bring it back to the field with you. Place it in the path of the hillbilly's car to stop it in it's tracks. Cletus.

[top]
Mile High Club
Lick the Hanging Glider

GoatVille

This one may take some practice to get right. First of all, you'll need to climb all the way to the top of the yellow construction crane and walk to the end of the boom arm. Push the crew member off of the ledge and wait for the hang glider to get close. Now you should slow the game down with and try to pass just under the glider. If you want, you can apply the Angel Goat Mutator to slow your fall with so you can steer better. As you pass underneath him, press to quickly dart out your tongue and lick the glider. Enjoy the ride!

[top]
Goat of the hill
Everything the light touches is your kingdom

GoatVille

While you're up on the construction crane, why not try to climb to the very top? Walk to the end of the boom arm where the crewman was sitting and jump up on top of the yellow girder. Balance along the cable all the way to the crane's highest point. You'll also grab a goat trophy at the summit.

[top]
A Story about my elevator
Get up on the skyscraper without using the elevator

Goat City Bay

The skyscraper is the most easily recognizable landmarks in the level, towering above everything else. To get to the top, you need to enter an elevator in the main lobby... Or do you? Around back is a casino area that you can jump on top of. Once there, note the conveniently placed mattress near the wall. Bounce on it twice to launch your goat up and over a pool party to a group of powerful fans on the wall. Land on one to propel yourself straight up to the roof level. Now that you're here, enjoy the music and your new trophy.

[top]
Mattress Madness
Bounce 100 times on mattresses within 30 seconds

GoatVille

Bouncing on a single mattress simply isn't enough, as the bounces are far too slow to add up in the required time. You'll need to find a very specific set of mattresses near the top floor of the building in the construction site. In the corner overlooking the town, there are a bunch of mattresses laid out on the floor, as well as a few on the ceiling (two questions: how and why?) After bouncing on one of them enough, you'll begin to hit the ones on the ceiling and ricochet between them rapidly. You'll start drifting off towards the sides after a few bounces, so you'll need to try to stay centered. Slowing time with should help you to not over-correct and lose the bounce multiplyer. Keep on bouncing for 30 seconds (real time) and you should have no issue earning this trophy.

[top]
Trying to bring forth Sanctum 3?
Sacrifice the 3 Sanctum items

GoatVille

Remember the two Walker statues from earlier? It's finally time to put them to good use. Gather both statues in the pentagram and head to the construction site. See the shipping container hanging from the crane? You need to find a way inside of it. Climb to the top and jump down onto the crate. Make your way to the opening and carefully jump in, but be ready to headbutt. A robot will try to push you out of the crate, so hit him before he can hit you. Once he's knocked down, lick him and drag him back to the pentagram. Once there, the sacrifice will take place and you'll pop the trophy.

[top]
Around the World in 5 Jumps
Visit 5 trampolines in one jump, bouncing on each trampoline once

GoatVille

There are 5 trampolines in GoatVille that you can bounce on. They can be found:
  • One on the construction site building's roof
  • Two in the empty swimming pool
  • One near the party in the backyard
  • One in the yard with the Goat Tower.
To earn the trophy, you need to jump on each trampoline only once, while not touching the ground. To do so, start by climbing up the crane and jumping onto the roof's trampoline. The fall height should give you plenty of bounce to reach the two in the pool. From there, soar through the air to the one near the party, and then one final long leap across the street to the last target. IF you're having trouble reaching any of the trampolines, you can activate the Angel Goat and Double Jump Mutators from the pause menu. The extra jump and slow falling should give you plenty of room for error.

[top]
Try Hard
Find all the trophies in Goat Ville!

GoatVille

Goat Trophies are scattered across each of the maps. These small golden statues aren't very difficult to reach, but may be hard to see. There are 30 of them in GoatVille.
  1. Goat Tower: Second floor, behind the goat on lookout duty.
  2. Inside Goat Tower: In the throne room, you can find it behind a crate on the left.
  3. Starter House: Green Bedroom on 2nd floor.
  4. Gas Station: In the garage.
  5. Blue shipping crate: across from the gas station.
  6. Construction scaffolding: On the side of the large building.
  7. Blue shipping crate: Hanging from the crane. Headbutt the robot to gain access.
  8. Top of the crane: Walk to the end of the boom arm and walk up the cable to the top. You can also earn Goat of the hill here.
  9. Schoolhouse: Under the school's bell.
  10. Shed: Across from the schoolhouse.
  11. Diving Board: At the top of the pool's diving board.
  12. Water Slides: Underneath the slides, toward the center.
  13. Near the pool wall: There is a small hole at the bottom of the wall (near the diving boards) with the trophy in it.
  14. Greenhouse: Near the party.
  15. Protest: Behind the stage.
  16. Coffee Stain Studios: On the roof.
  17. Coffee Stain Studios: In the white room on the 2nd floor.
  18. Boulder of Death: Behind the boulder.
  19. Power Pylon: Under the tower near the Pentagram.
  20. Shed: Across from the protest. It has fans on the roof.
  21. On the power Lines: Use the shed fans for a boost up there. Be careful when balancing!
  22. Power Pylon: On top of the center pylon.
  23. Tree: In the middle of the field.
  24. Outhouse: Near the Fighting Ring.
  25. Fence: Also near the Fighting Ring.
  26. Grain Harvester: Next to a car.
  27. Size Changing Pit: On the edge of the pit.
  28. Low Gravity Testing Facility: On the roof, near the center of one of the spinning blades (slow time)
  29. Low Gravity Testing Facility: Inside on one of the roof support beams above the control room.
  30. Low Gravity Testing Facility: Inside the fan chamber. Enter the air vent to collect the trophy.

[top]
Tony Goat
Finish all manual quests

There are 3 Manual-related quests for you to complete as you play through either of the levels. The 3 levels of this quest require 1000, 2000, and 3000 points to complete. These can be completed at any time, so have at it. For best results, find an open stretch of land free of obstacles, as running into anything will cause you to fall over. To perform a manual, quickly push down and then up on the to move your goat onto her front legs and begin walking. A slider will appear on the right, showing where your center of balance is. To keep from flipping over forward/backwards while you walk, you will have to adjust your tilt by moving the up or down. Try to keep it centered for as long as possible to get the highest score. To exit the Manual and count your score, simply press to jump and land safely. Allowing yourself to fall over will negate your score. Once you hit 3000, jump out of the Manual for a new trophy.

If you are having trouble, you can always slow time with to give yourself a longer opportunity to correct your tilt.

[top]
The Flapmaster
Score 10 points in Flappy Goat

Remember when Flappy Bird was popular, spawning millions of copycat games? Coffee Stain has decided to re-brand the difficult mobile title as an arcade-style minigame within each of the two levels. One is found on a TV upstairs in Coffee Stain's headquarters in GoatVille, as well as on an arcade machine in Goat City Bay. You can access the minigame by pressing in front of it. The object of the game is simple enough: press to jump between the obstacles. Making it through each set of obstacles will grant you one point, but don't assume it will be an easy task. Like the original game, you have very little margin for error, with one ill-timed jump ending in failure. You'll need to slog through 10 gates to reach the required score, and you begin to get frustrated if your timing is poor. Once you've cleared 10 obstacles, feel free to headbutt/kick the TV screen.

[top]
Valkyrie
Go on the catapult with a rider on your back

Goat City Bay

Head to the the Carnival and jump into the mechanical bull ride. Headbutt the bull and a human will jump into the ring and onto your back. Escape the Carnival and head back to the dam. At the top of the hill is a large catapult. Jumping into the catapults barrel will launch you all the way across the map and the trophy will unlock.

*Goat Trophy* There is a goat trophy in the catapult. You will automatically collect it when jumping in.

[top]
One Ball
Ride a bike for 60 sec

In each of the levels, you can find bicycles just waiting to be ridden. Walk up to one and press to hop on. You will begin to tilt to one side, and you must correct this by pushing or . You don't have to be moving forward on the bike, which is a good thing, as you can quickly run out of room and crash into something. Just keep yourself from falling off of the bike for a full minute and then hop off. The trophy should unlock as soon as you do.

[top]
Builder Goat
Find all the blocks

Goat City Bay

Minecraft has invaded, bringing with it 3 blocks of various elements that you must find. Once you've found all 3 blocks, the trophy will unlock.
  • Cobblestone block: In the graveyard.
  • Grass and dirt block: On the hill beyond the skate park.
  • Wooden planks block: Between the forest and the amusement park. Near the water.

[top]
Is that a goat?
Lick the rollercoaster with 6 batteries attached

Goat City Bay

No amusement park is complete without a roller coaster. In order to "ride" the coaster in the park, you'll need to get its elevator up and running. To do so, you have to find and plug in all 6 car batteries that are scattered across the city. Lick and drag each one back to the generator to power it up.
  • At the rooftop concert. Behind the stage's back wall.
  • Behind the counter at the casino.
  • Across from the skyscraper in a large shipping crate.
  • On the roof of the cluster of buildings. One the corner facing the dam.
  • On the building with the water tower.
  • On the dock near the elevator.
Once all six are in place, you can ride the elevator up and lick one of the cars to "ride" it.

[top]
Hat Simulator
Buy all hats

Goat City Bay

Time to class up your goat a bit. Across from the skyscraper is a store called Weathers. In the display window are 6 different hats that you can buy, assuming you've found a stack of cash and brought it to the store. There are plenty of these hidden around the city, so go lick one and bring it back to try on a new hat. You can find money:
  • At the convenience store, on the counter.
  • Behind the counter of the skyscraper.
  • On the second floor of the skyscraper, two on the couch.
  • On the casino's counter.
  • Four can be found at the restaurant, on the outdoor tables.
Once you've brought a stack of cash back, drag it to the counter and then go pick out a hat. Repeat the process until you've tried on all 6 for the trophy to unlock.

*Warning* If you knock over one of the hats before buying it, you will be unable to try it on unless you reload the map.

[top]
I freaking love goats
Find all collectibles on level 2

Goat City Bay

As in GoatVille, there are 30 golden goat statues hidden throughout the map that you can find.
  1. In the catapult where you earn Valkyrie.
  2. In the Pink house.
  3. In the white house's (no garage) bedroom.
  4. In the whit house's (with garage) yellow room.
  5. In the graveyard on a cross grave.
  6. Yellow buildings near the beach. On a balcony.
  7. On a table in the hotel lobby.
  8. In the window wall of the casino.
  9. On the ledge of the skyscraper's pool area.
  10. On the corner ledge of the rooftop concert.
  11. Toy store window. (Headbutt that glass!)
  12. In the alley near the bonfire.
  13. Past Club Nubian, take the fan up to find this near some gas canisters.
  14. Right above the Club on the balcony.
  15. On the billboard across from the skyscraper.
  16. on one of the docks along the river.
  17. One the wall at the end of the river in front of the dam.
  18. In the turtle lair from Ling Ling into battle go.
  19. On the ticket booth at the entrance to the amusement park.
  20. On top of the spinning ride.
  21. On the boat near the Ferris wheel.
  22. On top of the roller coaster.
  23. Near the water past the park.
  24. On the water tower.
  25. In the art gallery on a trash can.
  26. On a low roof near Miriam Core.
  27. Near a fence in the forest.
  28. Next to the tunnel.
  29. On the Parkour Obstacle Course. This may take some fancy maneuvering to get to, but don't give up!
  30. On the Island. You can only get there by getting on the boat near the skyscraper. Lick the boat and hang on for dear (goat) life!


[top]Credits

Thanks as always to ERICVOLTAGE for the banners.



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